possible counter-maneuver (C-M) needed

So here's the scoop: Two of my kickass roomies and I are heading downstate tonight for a weekend of camping, rock climbing, bonfiring, and general merriment. We're going to a place called Jackson Falls, just south of the the tiny little burg of Ozark.

I decided to post this because you never can be too sure. There have been reports recently verifying packs of roaming evil red ninjas, and in the event that I don't make it back Sunday night, I'd like everybody to know where to send the Tactical Ninja Counter-Offensive Unit (TaNC-OU). Better safe than sorry, right?

Also, we'll be in a bright yellow tent should the Aerial TaNC-OU (AerTaNC-OU) need to be dropped in. Should things begin to look bad, we may have to escalate to Code Orange and drop in the Anti-Ninja Star AerTaNC-OU (A-NiSAerTaNC-OU) to get me out.

I appreciate everyone's attention. I keep you all informed because, should a ninja strike happen, what would the world be like without me?

Thank you.