When I get excited – for any reason, good or bad – I lose my ability to communicate. I’ve begun noticing when I’m calm I can be articulate, reasoned, concise, and clear. Anything else, I start rambling, stuttering, forgetting simple words, talking myself (and whatever I’m talking about) in circles, getting further and further from the point, and ultimately losing track of the entire discussion. Not to mention supremely weirding people out. What royally sucks is it’s exactly those times that I’m discussing something I’m passionate about that I want to explain why. It’s so goddamn frustrating when I’m talking about something exciting with someone, and it feels like my passion and my ability to impart said passion are in this diabolically evil inverse relationship. One that does imply causation, if there was any question. And for as long as I can remember, it’s made me feel like a damn idiot.
And people wonder why I prefer to communicate in writing, where I can stare at the computer screen with a blank look on my face without it staring back, wondering when I’m gonna come back to earth.
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